Power in of itself has many definitions that are both empowering as well as disempowering. Power is an agent that acts in a direction that is dependent on what it is paired with. If power is affixed to empowerment, the effect will manifest life affirming offspring. BUT if power is connected to control, the union becomes an incestuous marriage where power and control becomes one of the hardest addictions to break. I will use substance addiction as an example of how this marriage produces its offspring; but truth be told, power and control metastasizes in many areas of our lives, especially in relationships of all types. I have met too many addicts who put the drink down but fill the addiction with toxic relationships, obsessive work habits or extreme religious beliefs. I have also met many addicts who have never touched a mood altering substance, but are out of control with themselves, yet still insist on manipulating and controlling others. Here, the first step in the 12 step program deals with admitting one is powerless applications across the board. This step is one of the most difficult arguments against the ego. Yet, without surrendering to peace; as that is the core of powerlessness, then the power struggle is marked with justifications and amendments.

Controlling others is the tangible act of power. The more power hungry a person; the more controlling they are of others. That is one of the many features of an addicted mind. Some of the most disturbed dictators in this world had an addiction to power and control. Joseph Stalin was one of the most mentally disturbed dictators from Russia and his reign was marked by his tight grip of control. He recalled every detail in his day, less because he was brilliant and more because he was controlling. A truly brilliant mind illuminates with freedom; whereas a power addicted mind dims with subjugation. Stalin fell into the later. He was so controlling that he suffered from profound paranoia that marked anyone who was not controllable as an enemy worth death. This, of course, is the extreme. Power and control also manifests in work and home. The irony is that the most controlling people have a deep fear that they can not control themselves. Addiction is a realized state of when we can no longer trust ourselves to control ourselves.

We seem to be at war with our ego that we must "know." Given we use a little more brain power than an ape, the wiser choice is to "wonder." God is powerful because it represents knowledge and wisdom larger than us. If you do not believe in God, then there is still something larger than human beings: death. Death renders us powerless; but also reveals our sublime humility that we are but children in the mysteries of the universe. Camus' story, The Myth of Sisyphus was about a man named Sisyphus who tried to outwit (power) death by chaining it (control). When death escaped, Sisyphus was condemned to roll a stone up a mountain for eternity. If he succeeded in rolling the stone to the other side of the mountain, he would have been granted the power of immortality. Yet, his obsession blinded him and every time Sisyphus rolled the stone to the top of the hill, it fell back down. The story has many meanings, but to me it was about the addiction to power and control.

Addiction is much like an obsessive relationship where intense clinging and control marks the victim; promising a high that is never grassed. Power gives a glimpse of feeling powerful and then brings us to our knees in utter powerlessness. The higher something props our ego's will, the longer and harder the fall than that perch. But what if the craving for power was removed? What if the high to control was faced and dismantled? There are many ways to fight addictions, but consider one more dimension. Meaning, lessening our urges to control people, places and things outside of ourselves. The effect of doing this will diminish the power desires within that is akin to a hungry ghost. The less urges to chase power and control, the more likely we will be able to go from an addicted mind to an at-peace mind. Letting go does not mean giving up on ourselves. It means giving up an addiction that stands in the way of ourselves.