"You idiot," shouts the wife with hands on hip. "How can I ever trust you to do anything right," she scolds. The soundtrack goes wild with gales of laughter from the audience while her husband hangs his head like a whipped puppy in response.

I'm sure you have seen this scenario on one of your favorite TV shows.

Funny? Many think so.

But let's break down this scenerio to understand how this seemingly innocent exchange of words and actions can undermine the marriage relationship.

The family arrangement is designed to work as a well-oiled machine with the husband lovingly taking the lead and each family member working in harmony with the other. This arrangement is not designed to be tyrannical or dictatorial. The husband's role is a weighty one, but he discharges his responsibility in love.

However, he can't make the marriage work by himself. He depends on his support system – his loving complement, his wife, and that of their children for success of his leadership. If the wife rebels against this arrangement, confusion, chaos and discord, wreak havoc within the family unit.

A crucial point on this subject is that TV writers of today's family comedies undermine the marriage arrangement as it was designed to work. The sitcoms depict husbands as bungling stupid idiots that have to be berated by their wives because of their incompetence. It may be good for laughs on TV – but the reality is that such conduct tears down the relationship! How could anything good come from berating someone you love? Where is the respect?

A loving husband will be interested in his wife, her thoughts, her activities, her feelings about things. He'll make her feel wanted. Women need to feel wanted. He'll hold her in honor. He'll let her know that they're working as a team, that it is' we 'and' ours', not 'I' and 'you' or 'mine' and yours. '

Most important is the giving of himself. His time, energies, attention and thoughts, especially those closest to his heart. When the wife speaks to her husband in a loving kind manner, not berating him he will do everything he can to build up his marriage and engulf his wife with love.

Word of caution to wives: Above all, don't usurp your husband's leadership and berate him. If you succeed, you won't like him, and he won't like you or himself.

So wives all you have to do is show love and respect toward your husband. Don't berate him. It's simple but not necessarily easy if you've been caught up 21st century disrespect posing as comedy. It takes time and determination working together to achieve this respect. But won't a happy marriage be worth the effort?